Waiting

I have been feeling frustrated with my job hunting lately. There are opportunities but I have to wait. They don’t just interview you then start on a Monday convenient for you.  You have to wait for months to be called back, then you take exams, have interviews, then you wait for them to call you back again because they are still to open the position. 

Well, if I applied in a private institution I would’ve been working for probably 7 months now. But I would pay for training and live on a meager salary with probably no overtime pay, and snotty patients, probably. The facilities would be way, way better than the public hospitals’, but some patients view you as the doctor’s assistant and not a professional with your own set of duties and responsibilities.

There is also this “I don’t know what I really want to do with my life” dilemma. Seeing that I never wanted to be a nurse in the first place, but apparently I am good at it so I keep on doing it. I am afraid that I will never be able to find what I really want, and that I will end up being a nurse for the rest of my working life. It’s not a bad thing per se, I am okay with helping people, especially the relatives of the sick in coping with the situation (because I’ve been there), but I just can’t imagine doing it forever.  I just never fell in love with it, I guess, unlike other people I know whose first choice isn’t nursing.

I did have a part time job teaching english to Chinese students. It was an online, home based job. I also tried transcribing.  Both did not turn out well, as I just felt bored and frustrated, for reasons I do not know. Maybe because I don’t really like what I was doing. It was depressing because I thought there is something wrong with me because I can’t stay long on a job.

Now, I am trying to wait as patiently as I can.  I will probably try to look for an interesting online job. 

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